9 signs you’re a Bali Bogan (but don’t even know it)

Bali? Why would I go to Bali? Sure, it’s gorgeous, with amazing beaches, markets, and cultural experiences. But with all the partying, binge drinking and spot-you-from-a-mile-away Aussies, I could just go to the Gold Coast, right? These were just a few of the thoughts I had when my partner suggested that he and I go on a short, but much needed, relaxing holiday in Bali. “But isn’t Bali for bogans?” I wondered. Well, it might be, but by the end of our 10-day trip, I was well and truly embracing my inner Bali Bogan without even realising. Here are nine signs you’re a Bali Bogan, too, even if you don’t know it.

1. Bintang T-shirts somehow make their way into your suitcase *gasp!*

As if you’d buy a Bintang T-shirt and wear it around the island! Well, by day two of your stay, I guarantee you’ll not only want to buy one for yourself, but a few for everyone you’ve decided to buy souvenirs for. Yes, including Grandad.

Grandad would rock a Bintang tee!

2. You’re more concerned about happy hour than breakfast

When’s happy hour again? When your Bali hotel includes a free cocktail at happy hour, delivered straight to your banana lounge by the pool, why would you bother worrying about breakfast? Although bacon and eggs will definitely go down a treat the next morning 😉

Is it happy hour yet?

3. You say bye-bye to your bra

I am not the type of person to go further than the bedroom without wearing a bra, but it wasn’t long before the Balinese heat and hedonistic vibes had me wandering around willy-nilly with unstrapped boobies. Bali Bogan alert!

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Beach hair, dont care. ⛱

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4. You’ve developed an enviable thong tan (the shoe type)

Being a Brisbanite, I have embraced the reality of an all-year thong tan, but if you’re not from the tropics, then your new foot look will really put you into the Bali Bogan category. Double points for a Birkenstock tan.

Bae isn’t impressed with my tan either

5. Your sarong has become a perfectly acceptable item of day/nightwear

Have you just realised how versatile a sarong is? Welcome to the Bali Bogan club. Not only do they work well as skirts and something to lay on at the beach, but you can also wear one as a scarf, a shawl when it gets cool (never happens), or use one as a picnic blanket when you’re at the local markets, eating your fifth satay since arriving (yesterday).

Or wear it on your head.

6. You have photos of yourself doing yoga poses, because #blessed #namaste

There is a HUGE yoga culture on the island of Bali and before too long you’ll be snapping pictures of yourself on the beach doing Happy Dog pose and Downward Baby or whatever they’re called. Head to the local markets and buy yourself a Ganesh singlet on the way to class and nirvana will kick in any minute.


7. You’re on the hunt for a hamburger

You’ve had three days’ worth of satays and now can’t bear to look at another piece of chicken on a stick. This is when the pangs for familiar foods from home kick in. Move over nasi goreng, I’m ready for a burger!

So many satay sticks!

8. Night-time singalongs are a thing

I wouldn’t usually feel the urge to sing Daryl Braithwaite’s ‘Horses’ back home, but there’s something about the hot air, the umpteenth bottle of Bintang, and the local band singing covers that makes singing in a bar with your new besties at three in the morning seem like an absolutely wonderful idea.

The beer made me do it!

9. You’ve spent more time napping by the poolside than sightseeing

Look, I had pizza at the hip new Italian place down the road three nights in a row (because cheese) and have just had my third happy hour cocktail. Don’t judge me.

A food coma in the making.

Are you a Bali Bogan, too? Let us know!

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